My cup runneth over - I am blessed with so many wonderful people in my life, family and friends - work that I love.
This time twenty years ago I never thought that I would feel this way, let alone be comfortable in my own skin. I sat around a circle in my Eric Morris-inspired acting class in San Francisco lost, alone, afraid, but most importantly, numb. Our acting teacher Robert wanted us to get in touch with what we were grateful for. I was ashamed that I couldn't think of a single thing. I was uncomfortably numb, so to speak, and for the next two years, I continued to vacillate between this awful numbness and search for comfort.
Feelings aren't always comfortable, are they? But growing up necessitates us learning how to manage those feelings, and it's hard. We're not perfect.
Make no mistake about it - gratitude is grace but it can also be a choice in the actions we take.
I am most grateful for cultivating gratitude, and for not believing that a state of numbness - comfortable or not - is acceptable. I am grateful to be able to experience the rich bounty of feelings that come my way, and the lessons that I learn from them.
I am grateful to be alive - and that twenty years ago I didn't give up.
What are you grateful for this year?
Family, Write Club, and my new computer.
ReplyDeleteSo glad you have a working computer - essential for us! I am also grateful that I'm finally going to get to give you a real HUG in early March!
ReplyDeleteI am late getting here, but I am grateful I love reading and writing! I don't know how people exist without the love of words, of metaphor, of poetry.
ReplyDeleteThanksgiving goes so fast ushering in the Christmas season. First Sunday in Advent as I write! Sometime this month I introduce local Episcopals to MLE! Advent, such a good time to do it.